A quantum of psychopathy
Have you ever pondered what it would be like to be inside a psychopath’s mind?
In documentaries about psychopaths, they explain how psychopaths have no empathy yet most of them are highly intelligent so they know that they have to fake being empathetic. They study social dynamics or copy master charmers to pretend that they know how to feel what someone else is feeling.
Have you ever felt like an impostor? That’s what psychopaths feel like all the time. In every social situation, they are constantly meta-analyzing everything to try to act like they are not a total alien. They are constantly asking: How would a normal person act in this situation?
The funny thing is…
That’s just how I feel when I’m on (some) smart drugs!
For example, the other evening I had to run to the grocery store. I was a bit weary from the long day, but still feeling the lingering effects of a half pill of Modafinil I had done earlier. I always try to go to the grocery store about 20 minutes before it closes — this is a lifehack because there are a lot fewer people there and the time limit forces me to do my shopping quickly (not browsing and making impulse purchases) — but this day I had to wait in line behind a little, old disabled woman, she took about five minutes to find her money and coupons.
This didn’t bother me much because I was in my own little world doing a breathing exercise and listening to a fascinating history podcast.
I made eye contact with the very bored checker as the slow customer is fumbling with her items, immediately my personal dialog goes: I don’t want the checker to think that I’m irritated with the old woman or not paying attention — occasionally they try to rip me off at this grocery store.
So I smile at the checker and shrug cavalierly.
A few minutes later I walked out of the store; off to the side of the entrance is an employee who I think is the janitor, smoking a cigarette. My personal dialog again opines: This guy has zero social status to me but I see him regularly at this grocery store. I don’t want him to think I’m a total douchebag, I should acknowledge him in a friendly way.
So I step on the pavement just a little harder so my footsteps ever so subtly catch his attention, I give him a friendly nod and a curt good night!
I act this way because The Art of Charm podcast taught me to be arbitrarily social with everyone, all the time so I’m similarly social even when I’m not on smart drugs. But after well over a decade of working on my social skills, I’ve attained unconscious competence — I’m finally a natural.
But when I’m on potent smart drugs like Modafinil (or sometimes the Racetams) I feel like a psychopath.
In every social interaction, I’m visualizing an invisible chessboard of competing frames, motivations, desires, status, risk, and opportunity. Veteran Biohackers (or those close to them), like Neal Thakkar here, will admit that long-term Nootropics usage does change your personality. Amongst the anecdotal reports, a lot of people report that it makes them more cocky and egocentric.
If you’ve long been the nice guy (or gal) that people disregarded or took advantage of smart drugs may inject a quantum of psychopathy into your personality that makes you a bit more functional in a cynical, unfair world. The poetic words of a Biohacker who did 24 grams of Piracetam capture this…
I’ve upped my dose to 24g per day since last night. The level of power is almost too much to bear…It is time to change the world. I will grip it with my own hands and squeeze it, tear it, turn it, pound it until it becomes my image. The eternities within the creation cycle will hear my voice. Death is coming soon but not just yet. I want more power until there is no end, and then I will turn it to use…It is almost time for me to become the tool of the silent voice and the hand of god. Being so close to the edge is frustrating. I must count the heartbeats. Timing, the timing is everything. A new game of chess, one that I will win no matter how the opponent moves. But for now I must wait. Patience…
The shine behind my eyes continues to grow. I am becoming something else: a mirror of the active side of infinity. A very dangerous thing indeed.
Last night I was smashing the skulls of cats. They didn’t put up much of a fight either. The night before I killed dozens of people and other creatures. For the first time they all lost to me. There was no fear, only the joy of reaping.
Creepy, right? From my article, What We’ve Learned About Piracetam.
And you don’t need to do 24 grams of any smart drug to feel like you are transforming into an evil genius. Actually, you should aim to, over time, decrease your intake and dosage of smart drugs.
Over time, smart drugs will change your personality.
- They’ll make you more motivated and focused.
- You’ll be more disciplined.
- More aggressive and assertive.
- A bit more cocky and egocentric.
- Don’t be surprised if they make you a more pragmatic, cynical, and judgmental person.
Imagine an Ayn Rand character who remembers all 48 of The 48 Laws of Power — ask yourself if you would like to become like that person?
In fact, I don’t recommend hardcore smart drugs to people navigating the morally grey seas of modern life by dead reckoning alone without a clarifying moral compass or ethical rudder, which could be…
Close friends or family
Study of moral philosophy
Mentors or accountability partners
The protocol for transforming into a more Machiavellian you…
It’s going to cost about $120 to implement but I can just about guarantee that it will result in a moment where you feel eerily like the Count of Monte Cristo when his old enemies realize they’ve been ultimately defeated. If you don’t get that metaphor you need to watch that movie again!