Why Semen Retention…
Part 1 of Master Mind Master Body Master Her
Check out an updated and improved version of this article here…
I’ll start by describing the first thing that men should not do if they want an amazing sex life…
Using porn. Why no fap…
“No Fap” means not masturbating to internet porn. You’re going to need to choose between having a rowdy sex life and enjoying porn — sorry, you don’t get to have both! So much of our motivational psychology is just a manifestation of our selfish genes trying to get into the next generation that when you masturbate frequently with your own hand you deprive yourself profoundly of natural male aggression, drive, and zest for life.
If you are a moderate masturbator, who is doing it a couple of times a week, you’ll find that no fapping increases your motivation and energy by like 25%-50%. However, if you’ve got a real porn addiction, where it’s an everyday thing or a couple of times a day, no fapping will really change your life, but it’s also going to be quite difficult. If you’re serious about this give a listen to this Free Domain Radio podcast interview with a very knowledgeable porn addiction expert who has some interesting things to say.
Get started no fapping…
- If you’re a first-time no fapper try to just go two weeks. This is sufficient for you to experience a noticeable boost in testosterone from not orgasming.
- If you can go for two weeks, try going for a whole month. This amount of time gives your brain the time to start reprogramming its arousal-reward system. 30 days of no fapping is a lot easier to accomplish if you drink no alcohol that month. So it’s better to just plan to abstain from both simultaneously.
- Then try going for 60 or 90-day blocks of no fapping. Once you develop this kind of discipline you’ll find that when you finally do use porn it’s kind of boring and uninspiring.
- If you keep practicing discipline and doing the kinds of things described in this book eventually you’ll get into an intimate relationship with a virtuous woman, who you’re enjoying sex with regularly, and then there won’t be much reason to watch porn — in fact, it will likely hurt your performance in bed!
Is fapping wrong?
I don’t see anything especially immoral about watching porn or masturbation. Yes, it is a vile industry that wrecks many young women’s lives, but you could say the same about Hollywood or even the music industry. Are you also going to stop watching movies and listening to music because of the peripheral costs to society of a product that you’re streaming for free on the internet? Pragmatically, I put watching porn in the same moral and hedonistic category as eating pizza…
Pizza is not intrinsically good or bad.
Eating pizza is a cheap, yet consistent pleasure that doesn’t last long.
Eating pizza every day is a bad idea that will make you profoundly unhealthy and generally unmotivated.
You can eat pizza about once weekly but you won’t really be in ideal health.
You could eat pizza once monthly and still be very healthy.
You could eat pizza just a few times yearly and be in excellent health and not really miss pizza.
You could completely give up pizza and replace it with a less pedestrian pleasure that gives you greater gastronomical enjoyment.
I’m a true hedonist, I chose the greater pleasure over the lesser pleasure and watching porn is a lesser pleasure compared to having a richer life because I’m motivated to go after everything that I really want, thanks to the no fapping.
Why semen retention?
No fap really is a commonality among high-performing men. Like Tantra, it’s a way to retain biologically costly semen. Retaining semen increases testosterone sharply and puts your cognition into overdrive because not coming for an extended period of time convinces your evolutionary psychology that you are not passing your genes on. On a biological level, your genes are screaming…
This guy is not making any babies! Gene death! Red alert! We need to give him a bunch of motivational fuel and dial his cognitive powers up!
But there are some notable downsides to no fap…
- If like a lot of single guys, you no fap, so you will have the motivation to get over your social anxiety — approach, date, and actually, try to get laid — it will work for that purpose! But after no fapping for 7–10 days (or more), you’ll find that things may be anti-climatic in the bedroom when you finally get down to business with someone you’re really attracted to. If you come after three minutes, sometimes she’ll totally forgive you and return to your bed, but sometimes it’s a job interview and you won’t get a callback. Tantric methods will give you the stamina to keep them coming back!
- If you’re in a healthy marriage or long-term relationship you are going to be having unprotected sex and ejaculating with your partner with about the same weekly frequency that I think the average single guy gets off to porn. Obviously, having sex with another real human is a whole lot healthier than making a mess by yourself, while transfixed by a glowing screen, but it has a similar effect on testosterone and your immune system. Tantra is transformative for long-term relationships and actually a loyalty biohack.
- No fap makes you really horny and horny you is known to make bad decisions, isn’t he? No fapping will reorganize your priorities around socializing and dating. Unless you are actively biohacking your self-control, no fapping may really put your lizard brain in charge, and you may not be happy with the smelly, wet places that scaley bastard drags you off into! There are several tantric methods that will help you better yield your sexual energies.
You may not have a raging porn addiction. If you’ve got a handle on your porn consumption and intermittently throughout the year do 30-day periods abstaining completely from it, if you so choose, tantric methods will even dial up the visceral pleasure of porn and can be used to abrogate its negative effects.
Fun Fact:
Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (popularly known as the Kinsey Report), an average man ejaculates about five thousand times during his lifetime; some men ejaculate many, many more times. During the course of an average man’s sex life (and this includes time spent locked in the bathroom), a man ejaculates 1 trillion sperm.
Wow, that’s a lot!
Porn Addiction
I’ve struggled with porn addiction. You probably have too. Many guys read a few articles about the personal development benefits of No Fap, practice a little self-control, and can quit porn cold turkey or at least cut back sharply. But a smaller proportion of guys have a more hardcore addiction; they have tried quitting porn multiple times and like heroin addicts, they shamefully relapse consistently. Going cold turkey doesn’t work for them. Just like many heroin addicts need to transition to a lesser drug, like Kratom to overcome their self-destructive vice; a tantric semen retention self-cultivation practice can be a way of reprogramming the damage a porn addiction does to the psyche.
If you’ve got a real hard-to-kick porn problem, you’ll want to stack other life hacks, tools, and behaviors…
- Install a porn blocker on your browser, smartphone, and at the wifi network level with a tool like OpenDNS which is free and takes just about 15 minutes to set up.
- Avoid all the thirst traps on social media; unfollow on Instagram and Facebook all the professional hot chick accounts that just post skanky photos.
- Filter adult content out of your Google Image searches.
- Delete your old porn collection.
- Do meditation, eat right, exercise, and go off booze to fortify your self-control.
- Hire an accountability coach (like me).
But I think that the most important motivation is to keep reminding yourself that the supreme pleasure of hot, unprotected sex with a real woman awaits if you can leave the porn behind.
Women are dangerous.
If you no fap and implement the tantric sex hacks described here, I’d urge you to read my book, Don’t Stick Your Dick in a Blender, because you’re going to be getting laid (maybe a lot) and I don’t want you to royally fuck up your life by sleeping with the wrong kinds of women. Good, yet naive, men routinely wreck their lives because they “stick their dick in a blender” — having sex with the wrong kinds of women. STDs, unplanned pregnancies, false accusations, mental health headcases, and divorce make chasing skirts a dangerous game. If you want to “test drive” the book, download these sample chapters and read them at your leisure on your E-Reader device or smartphone with the Kindle app.
Access the 7-part tantric sex course for men…
